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Google GSuite Legacy Free Edition Class Action Lawsuit is Going All the Way...

Gmail…down the toilet.

A legal firm named Chimicles, Schwartz, Kriner and Donaldson is taking a break from chasing ambulances to conduct a “class action investigation” to decide if it will commence a class action lawsuit against Google for discontinuing the free version of GSuite.

Most non-Americans are probably scratching their heads, so let me briefly explain.

In the US, about 3-4 times a year, the typical resident receives a postcard informing him that he can join a class action lawsuit.  As originally intended, a CAL is for a group of people who suffered a common injury.  While there are legitimate CALs, more typical is a highly systematized form of simple legal extortion.

For example, I received a card last year saying that the AM/PM chain of convenience stores improperly tacked on a .35 debit card fee.  If the stores had a sign up that said there was a fee, it would have been legal, but in some stores there was no sign.

Obviously, this an egregious violation of my rights, on par with Amistad.  I mean, they told me the price, and I agreed to it, but there wasn’t also a sign explaining the fee, so now the Constitution has been trampled.

Was I about to sue AM/PM on my own?  Of course not.  But by joining the suit, I get a check for $5.  That’s always what these are:

  1. Lawyer sniffs opportunity to make a quick buck
  2. Lawyer sues big company for $100 billion dollars because there was a spelling mistake on an ingredient list
  3. Big company says it’s not worth fighting, fine, here is $10 million
  4. Lawyers take their half, plus as many other costs and fees they can assign and bundle into their cut
  5. The rest is divided up among millions of people who get postcards

Indeed, there are web sites devoted to class action lawsuits.  Since very few require any kind of proof that you really did buy 2 gallons of 1% milk that later turned out to actually be 1.1% milk, why not sign up and get a check?  Many do.

Indeed, even with any deceit whatsoever on my part, I generally make $20-30 a year on CALs.  And this goes back 20 years.  In every single case, it’s a trivially stupid case where I suffered no real injury but since I do meet the criteria, I check a few boxes on a postcard or let my browser fill in my contact info on a web site, and I get another check in the mail.

Although it’d be great to get another free coffee courtesy of Chimicles, Schwartz, Kriner and Donaldson’s noble work to…well, make a quick buck for themselves, I’d rather Google just told them to bugger off and hit them with a legal buzzsaw of countersuits and motions.  I mean, come on – suing a company that’s offered a free service for 10+ and then decided to cancel it…this is a lawsuit?  In America, everything is a lawsuit.








  1. John Andersson:

    This post seems a bit hysterical. Maybe add a [Satire] tag to the start of it?

    Some comments:

    You make a claim that the action is “going down the toilet” but on the webpage linked, the class action hasn’t even started, it is only in investigation phase.

    The name of the law firm is written incorrectly, the correct name is: “Chimicles Schwartz Kriner & Donaldson-Smith” or if you want the full legal name “Chimicles Schwartz Kriner & Donaldson-Smith LLP”

    February 28, 2022 @ 6:14 am | Reply
  2. Nikolas:

    For Families that have their own domain , and have their personal email on this service , which was advertised a free for ever , and the service is still active is a pain to pay 6$ per mailbox per month. All their emails, their purchaces on google play , their phone backups their contacts , their photos …. are there !! Terminating the service is like google coming end terminating your free gmail account…. !!

    March 19, 2022 @ 5:53 pm | Reply
  3. Tox Marz:

    You sound like you’re bitter because you were sleeping when they handed out free accounts and now finding pleasure in others losing theirs.

    March 29, 2022 @ 3:45 pm | Reply
  4. Odin:

    I’m one of those who fell for Google’s advertisements of “free Google Apps for your entire family” in the early 2010s. So, most of my family have been using those free accounts – which look and work almost identical to free Gmail accounts – for over a decade. We made purchases via Play store that are tied to those accounts. My kids got “achievements” in mobile games that are tied to those accounts. Google now wants $60 a year from each of us, and have made it impossible to transfer those purchases, achievements, etc., anywhere else, even to a free Gmail accounts. I’ve spent at least 30 working hours migrating some of my daughter’s data to a free account (some, because a lot cannot be migrated) and reconfiguring her computers, tablets, smartphone, and so on. All of this only because Google had manipulated me into signing up for their “free” offer. Do you really believe that a $5 check would compensate for it? Given that there are thousands people like me, don’t you think that a class action suit is a necessary course of action?

    May 4, 2022 @ 7:50 pm | Reply
  5. Smarter Than You:

    Wow, Raindog308, you’re a complete and total idiot. How is it possible that you don’t understand the legitimacy of holding companies accountable to their legal obligations through class action lawsuits?
    How is it possible that you don’t understand that if a company gets away with lying to consumers about how much fat is in the milk it will start lying about the origin, grade, and pasteurization of the milk as well? And how could you not recognize that as extremely dangerous?

    Google advertised their legacy Google Apps accounts as free forever. If they end it now that means they lied about their offering. Why do you support companies lying to their consumers? Companies have a legal obligation to honor their advertisements. Many have been using their legacy Google Apps accounts since 2006 and have loads of data stored on and tied to those free legacy accounts. To now demand a fee for something that was advertised as free forever, or disable those accounts and data, is extortion and a fraud, and Google deserves to be sued for it. Not even for money, just for people to be able to keep their accounts and data for free forever as Google initially advertised and agreed. How could you be so stupid as to support a company breaking their agreement?

    If Google gets away with this don’t you recognize that the free @gmail.com email accounts are next??? Wise up!

    May 16, 2022 @ 5:32 am | Reply

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